I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
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