I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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