if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize