Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
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