Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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