All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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