You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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