yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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