Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
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