i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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