You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize