Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
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Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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