i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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