there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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