I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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