well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize