the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize