I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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