So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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