i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize