I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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