Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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