can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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