id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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