i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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