The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize