I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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