go do what you do best...puke behind churches
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
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you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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