Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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