Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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