____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize