Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize