you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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