just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize