six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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