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I heard we made out
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
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