just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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