How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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