Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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