there's paper in my vomit.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
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I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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