Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
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Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
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Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
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