He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Jerry, you need to find god
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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