he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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