Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize