I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize