Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
sick fucks of a feather flock together
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I just want to make out with him forever
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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