I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize