dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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