Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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