This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
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